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One evening an old Apache told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.

He said, « My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all.

« One is Evil – It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

« The other is the Spirit – It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith. »

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: « Which wolf wins? »

Norman m’a beaucoup fait rire avec cette vidéo dans laquelle il critique… les bilingues et tous leurs petits tics :

Bonus : le langage du quartier, c’est comme ça que parlent mes élèves. C’est très bien senti, j’ai bien ri !

You fuck my wife ?!Jake La Motta (Robert De Niro): Did you fuck my wife ?

Joey La Motta (Joe Pesci): What ?!

Jake La Motta: Did you fuck my wife ?

Joey La Motta: [pauses, looks insulted] How could you ask me a question like that ? How could you ask me ? I’m your brother. You ask me that ? Where do you get your balls big enough to ask me that ?

Jake La Motta: [cooly] Just tell me.

Joey La Motta: I’m not answerin’ ya. I’m not gonna answer that. It’s stupid.

Jake La Motta: You’re very smart Joey. You give me all these answers, but you ain’t givin’ me the right answer. I’m askin’ ya again. Did you or did you not?

Joey La Motta: [frightened but controlled] I’m not gonna answer. That’s a sick question, you’re a sick fuck, and I’m not that sick that I’m gonna answer it. I’m not tellin’ ya anything… I’m gonna leave.

If Lenore calls, tell her I went home. I’m not staying in this nuthouse with you, you’re a sick mess, I feel sorry for ya, I really do. You know what you should do ? Try a little more fuckin’ and a little less eatin’. You won’t have troubles upstairs in your bedroom and you won’t pick it up on me and everybody else.

Do you understand, you fuckin’ wacko? You’re crackin’ up! Fuckin’ screwball, ya ! [walks out the door]

Raging Bull, (1980).

  1. Indecision is the key to flexibility.
  2. There is absolutely no substitute for a genuine lack of preparation.
  3. Happiness is merely the remission of pain.
  4. Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.
  5. The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.
  6. The careful application of terror is also a form of communication.
  7. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.
  8. Things are more like they are today then they have ever been before.
  9. Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for.
  10. Everything should be made as simple as possible but no simpler.
  11. Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
  12. I have seen the truth and it makes no sense.
  13. Suicide is the most sincere form of self-criticism.
  14. If you think that there is good in everybody, you haven’t met everybody.
  15. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
  16. One-seventh of your life is spent on Monday.
  17. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
  18. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
  19. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
  20. The older I get, the faster I was.

Our Father, who 0wnz heaven, j00 r0ck!

May all 0ur base someday be belong to you!

May j00 0wn earth just like j00 0wn heaven.

Give us this day our warez, mp3z, and pr0n through a phat pipe.

And cut us some slack when we act like n00b lamerz,

just as we teach n00bz when they act lame on us.

Please don’t give us root access on some poor d00d’z box when we’re too psssed off to think about what’s right and wrong,

and if you could keep the FBI and HADOPI off our backs, we’d appreciate it.

For j00 0wn r00t on all our b0x3s

4ever and ever,

4m3n

Rapport de faute d’orthographe

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